Inate Instictaual Guilt, Anyone Wanna Stop?

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This convo is more directed towards the guys, but dont count yourself out ladies, your always welcome to chime in.Ever find it weird that you always have that urge to masturbate every so often (in my case quite frequently ) and then when you do and are done finishing your business your like why did I just do this. You kinda feel bad almost...not liek depressed where your like im going to buy a gallon of ice cream and go watch Oprah...but you just feel like something inside of you was whispering to you that maybe you shouldnt have done it nor should you continue to do it. And then you go on this all out sabatical and try to keep yourself from doing it and only to fail in the long run. Well I think about that from time to time and lately been thinking about it more than usual; trying to figure whats the logic behind it and where this feeling comes from that all guys seem to have whether they are deeply religious, mildly religious, or not religious at all. Now I know thats a generalization and Im sure that there is some that are an exception whom fall out of this realm of thought. In any case though, I am religious, christian to be specific and my conclusion is that God or what some might say a higher force puts this in our frame of mind. I mean I know there our other reasons that this could be...maybe you get this big sense of stilumlation and then all of a sudden in a couple of minutes its over leaving your frame of mind being a little down...but still I have a hard time accepting that logic.In any case I see a lot of people out there talking about how they want to stop in other posts...anyone want to try and stop with me....we could like be each others encouragement. I know it sounds lame...but I know that its a very hard thing to do for me and that Ive only lasted 1 month and 8 days with out doing it in the past....so if you have the same troubles of only being able to stop for a couple of weeks at a time then we could make this the offical trying to stop masturbating post That way we could talk about the daily pains and difficulities of stopping and urge each other to continue onwards on are hardest days.Anyways let me know if you guys dig what Im saying and/or if you want to try to stop too and post our struggles here as we try to get through it. Take it easy

> God or what some might say a higher force puts this in our frame of mind.

There are all kind of things in one's frame of mind, including anger, hatred, selfishness, and psychosis. Does God get credit for all of them?

I only have a problem with masturbation when it's a disttraction from doing something important (not that masturbation is not important; it's just not always the top priority).

But if you just want to stop, go ahead and see how it goes. If I were you, though, I'd look more deeply into the source of the guilt you seem to be feeling. In any case, I don't think there's any reason to believe that the feeling is innate or instinctual; it's learned.

I don't think the slight feeling of depression after orgasm is learnt - it seems to be too general. I assume it's hormonal.

That's a good point, but I didn't think that the depth of depression (described as guilt) is common. That feeling should then apply to any sexual act leading to orgasm, whether masturbation, intercourse, or whatever.

Well there's the well-known saying post coitum omne animal triste est ("after coition every animal is sad"), ascribed to Ovid but probably later.

> post coitum omne animal triste est

I've seen it attributed to Galen. The Economist used it to describe the tenth anniversary of ten new nations' joining the EU. But I digress. I haven't seen much information on the subject.

when you get depressed you sit around eating a gallon of ice cream and watch oprah?...why Oprah does she make you feel better?Anyway I know what you mean sometimes I feel really guilty afterwards too...

In reply to:not liek depressed where your like im going to buy a gallon of ice cream and go watch OprahNOOOOO why do people keep thinking I get depressed and watch Oprah, I saids its not like thats the case.Ok so maybe depressed was the correct word. Bascially just a sense of guilt. But really I dont want to call it guilt. Its just an undescribable feeling that your body tells yourself afterwards...something to the extend of why did you do that? I dont know how to explain it...you either understand it or you dont I guess

A sense of guilt comes from social conditioning. In some cultures, a woman feels a deep sense of guilt if some guy on the street sees her elbow. You can either run with the guilt and quit masturbating, or you can be introspective and think about the source of the guilt, and deal with it.

No guilt brotha...its just something in my head. Like I said you either understand it or you dont. You fall in the dont category....which is fine...but do keep trying to say its guilt I keep reconfirming that its not quite a guilty feeling even though from outside of the picture that would seem to be the case.

In my case it's a feeling of "why did I waste my time like that?" (It usually takes me an hour.)I've seen a comedian who expressed it as "I'm a sex god! I'm a sex god! . . . (long pause) . . . I'm pathetic".

SOmething kinda sorta like that...lol...I liek the comedia quote though.

So it's not a feeling of guilt, and it's not a feeling of depression, and it's not describable. It sounds kind of Zen. I assume that the feeling is caused by something going on in the brain. We'll have to wait for the functional imaging studies to find out.

No its not Zen either, while Buddhism as some good aspects to its religion, I dont like its outlooks on certain things. At one point in my life I was about to become a buddhist my friend almost had me convinced but have a couple of years of thinking about it I returned to my Christianity. Thank God.

ChristianityEven though you say the feeling is not one of guilt, and even though Ineligible mentions that the feeling was decribed in ancient times, and even though there's evidence that it's not a learned response, I wonder if the might not still be some subtle suconscious connection.

Oddly, even before I learnt it was supposed to be wrong to masturbate, I thought that doing it was bad luck. I just associated it with bad things happening. And this was way before I was conditioned to think that sort of thing. I always wondered why that is. Is that a sign that it's inherently wrong or something? Or maybe I was a really neurotic kid.

Even whey you were young, you weren't deaf and blind. It's likely that you picked up some idea of how people felt about sexualtiy and genitalia, which affected how you felt toward them.

Yeah, that's most likely.