How do I know if I'm gay?

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I've never had a girlfriend. But then again, I've never had a boyfriend. Nor have I had sex of any kind.

I get turned on by women and want to have a heterosexual relationship, with marriage and kids etc. The idea of homosexual relationship does not appeal to me in any way, shape or form. However, gay sex does appeal to me as much as sex with a woman.

Is this confusion down to the fact that I have never had sex before (i.e. did a lot of people feel the same at adolescence?) or do you think that because I have looked at gay porn before I might be totally gay?

My sexuality, like a lot of things in my life, worries me, and the fear of abnormality will never go away. Especially not if I have to live a lie all my life (I'll never admit that I'm gay to other people). :frowning:

It's pretty normal for people to be attracted to members of the same sex in a sexual way. Most people won't admit it, but it's true. But, your sexuality is not defined by your sexual attraction, rather your sexual attraction AND emotional attraction. It's possible you are sexually attracted to both sexes, but only emotionally attracted to one.I don't know what advice to offer other than that sooner or later, you will figure yourself out. You may very well be just sexually attracted to males, and also emotionally, but be in denial about it so that you think you're not. Or, you might just be attracted to the male figure. Sooner or later you might find you are only attracted to females sexually and emotionally. Looking at gay porn won't make you gay. If this were the case, half the world's population would be homosexual from seeing other members of the same sex nude at one point or another.Give it time, and you will just know your true feelings. Don't be scared of being "abnormal", because homosexuality and bisexuality aren't exactly "abnormal". If in fact you come to realize you aren't heterosexual, don't worry. I wasn't ready to tell anyone that I was attracted to both males and females, but once I was out of highschool and came to love who I was, it wasn't a worry to me like it was before.A quote from Armistead Maupin comes to mind:"My only regret about being gay is that I repressed it for so long. I surrendered my youth to the people I feared when I could have been out there loving someone. Don't make that mistake yourself. Life's too damn short."

Man I feel pretty similar to you.

and to think I thought you were just joking this whole time about wanting to be my catcher strapingyounglad. Boy will I remember not to joke around like that anymore, yikes.

Oh I thought you really loved me! I feel used! It aint so bad...I'm getting pretty certain I'm streight now actualy. But I totally get how that guy feels. yANKEE you say you do fancy girls as well as guys right? Well like then maybe your Bi? I really dont want to be Bi but I still think I might be sometimes But I dont reckon being Bi would be that bad. I mean you could get with girls and all that and get married and have kids. Maybe jack off to a good ole bit of male ass-sex but so what? Ya wouldnt actualy have to have sex with guys. Thats how I would go about life if I was bi. You might say thats wrong of me cos I should be open about stuff but really the ladies are my first concern and I wouldnt want a girl feeling awkward everytime I went out for a drink with the guys.

In reply to:

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Maybe jack off to a good ole bit of male ass-sex but so what? Ya wouldnt actualy have to have sex with guys. Thats how I would go about life if I was bi.

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Thats how it starts; and then next thing you know it your screwing every neighborhood boy and his brother :frowning: Any guys on here from Leeds? If so run for your lives :grin:

Everytime a homosexual denies the validity of his feelings or restrains himself from expressing them, he does a small hurt to himself.

Well I'm not gay. I really do like girls.

Like yankeeboy said...just come out and free yourself Straping...why hide in the closet any longer? Your doing a small hurt to yourself by not coming clean yah know? I mean look at my best friend whos gay, this is him only minutes after he came clean with his family and friends, doesnt he look like the most happiest indivdual in the world. His name is Jer by the way if your interested http://img193.imageshack.us/my.php?image=jercow8hn.jpg

word!

Hey Swingcat...I wanna be swung today.....sounds like it could be fun

Sure, i have an hour unbooked between 21 and 22 tonight :wink: :grin:

I'd only come of the closest to get into your's purply darling

Well tell you what let me see how this whole swinging thing goes with Swingcat and then well work from there with where our future lies with one another. fair? deal?

hey yankee, ild like to give you my point of view on this situation.

Everyone says adolesance is an extrememly confusing time, and it is, however, eveyrthing question can be resolved with ur heart.

Regardless of who or what you are sexually attracted to, what do you feel deep down inside you. I am gay, and although my whole life i have been confused about the same issue, I HAVE ALWAYS KNOWN DEEP DOWN WITHIN ME.

Even the idea of having a wife, house and kids is very attractive to even gay people but it really has nothin to do with it. And i believe sexual attraction only has a small part to do with it, for a long time i found boys disgusting but still wanted to BE with them.

Follow your heart.
whateva you are, straight, gay, bi, you already know what you are, and remember, it doesnt define you as a person!

How do I know if I'm gay...

If you really fall in love with someone of the same sex, then you're homosexual. Don't try answering this question just with your mind. I think this way you will never get the answer.. How do you realize that you're in love? You'll figure it by yourself (you get these nasty heartaches all the time). Don't forget that there're more important things than sex.

Watching some gay porn doesn't make you necessarily homosexual. It can just mean that you're attracted to man figures. If you're still young (about under 16), you cannot define clearly your sexual orientation.

I don't think it's wrong to be homosexual or bi. I just know it's a foolishness to hide your own emotions even from yourself. Anyway, try your best remaining calm and go with the flow. Maybe the answer will knock you door someday, and it can be the man or your woman of your life :wink:

(Yes, life does hide suprises!)

heya i think ur most probally bisexual so u want a relationship with a woemn but want to have sex with a man. i know how you feel i'v just been thro that stage and realse i'm not bi and it was just a phase but mite reconsinder in the future just see how it goes m8

Your best friend used too many drugs and alcohol to hide his sexuality. LOL