Going 2 Canada

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And if they search your car?

I'll bet you're the first person to have thought of that. Good luck.

Based on the last encounter with border patrol they didn't seem to care what went into the U.S.

That's a good use of inductive reasoning.

I'm sure that there's a big market for moose-fertilized marijuana in the U.S. that hasn't been exploited. I see a great business opportunity for you.

How often do they ask about criminal records when you drive into canada?

I have no idea, but I doubt that they'd bother asking unless you aroused suspicion. In all my travels between the U.S. and Canada, and the U.S. and Europe, it's never happened. I was stopped in France while driving for going the wrong way up a one-way street, and by the customs police (WTF?) for accidentally going through a toll booth without paying. It's not likely to come up unless you're planning to emigrate.

I have just heard that they keep a lot of people out because of DUIs especially

If they run your passport through a scanner (which can read the number at the edge), their computer might flag certain things, like felony convictions. I don't now what the policy is regarding the U.S.'s sharing such things with other countries, but I would think if they shared it with anyone, it would be Canada.

Dont have a passport, dont need one until the end of this year to get into canada. I'm not sure if I should apply for a temporary residents permit or just chance it.

I'm not sure if I should apply for a temporary residents permit or just chance it. For Canada? You planning to stay there for a long time?

I'll be there only 9 days already reserved a boat and a guide and hotel rooms and bought plane tickets so I don't want to get screwed but I am afraid if I apply and get turned down they'll be waiting for me.

I have absolutely no idea why, as a tourist, you would apply for a temporarly resident's permit. You're not gong to be working there.You can probably get more authoritative information from a Canadian consul or embassy.Take a look at this Web page: What is stopping you from crossing the border?This might also help: Keep Exploring (Canada)

Since it hasn't been 5 years since the completion of my sentence the only way for me to be considered "admissable" is to obtain a TRP. I know its ridiculous but I dont want to blow it

It sounds like you know what you're doing...just do what you need to do.

Turns out it takes six months to process any kind of request so I am going to just give it a go.