A worm with sperm

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Hi cenfath!! I understand exactly what you're saying. Here I am - a 40 year old male [will be 41 on the 27th!!] and have lived alone ALL of my adult life. I don't NEED anyone for anything. I can do [and have done] everything myself. [cook, clean, pay the bills, etc., etc.] That said - I didn't mean to imply anything specific - insofar as what 'chores' [so to speak] would be considered masculine or feminine. I think each couple can figure that out for themselves. What I'm referring to has more to do with how the couple responds to each other. [and how they respond to the world around them] If you had a 'man' in your life - I think it would be 'ideal' if HE [for instance] was in charge [for lack of a better word] of anything that threatened both of you AS a couple. The female in a male/female relationship should back off IF the 'couple' is threatened [in any way] and allow the male to respond. [even IF she is more than capable of dealing with the threat - herself] I say that - because the world responds better to a male in a defensive role. And because of that - the female would do what's best FOR the 'couple' - and allow HIM to take on that responsibility. [am I making any sense at all?! lol] Why oh why do I post messages at 3 am!! I'm sure you can recall times when a male took a stand and was not looked down upon for doing so - but when a female did exactly the same thing - she was dismissed as a 'bitch'. [as unfair as that may be] Oh oh... it's finally happened. I've gone blank!! lol If I can think of more to say - I'll post another message!! Thanks for responding.GREAT BIG HUGCraig!!

In reply to:It's quite common for people to project their OWN problems onto someone else Arnt you projecting things in your life onto other peoples lives just as i am? except with ideals instead of problems? not that theres much of a difference between the two (a lot of problems stem from peoples ideals, or this thread would consist of your first post and nothing else, with no-one putting their point forward).what do you think of couples who adhere to having the men at home playing out a 'womans role', being the so called worm with the sperm, and women who go out to work to pay the bills? what are those women called then? 'the butch with the breasts?'just curious on the last point.p.s thanks for posting about this, its really making me think

lol, agreed

Hi no1sexpotinusa!! The fact that your mother was stupid enough to marry TWO losers in a row - doesn't make MY point 'stupid' OR 'sexist' And when it comes to a women being married to a man who "absolutely refuses to take responsiblity" - there is a solution to that. It's called DIVORCE. GREAT BIG HUGCraig!!

You should have created a NEW topic for what you are talking about - because it has little to do with the original point I was making. The 'topic' was not about single parent families OR what it's like to grow up struggling to survive. GREAT BIG HUGCraig!!

i 'wear the pants' in my relationship. and i like it, very much so. i prefer being in control and making decisions for 'us'.

In reply to:Btw I never agreed with Craig on this, he's a dipshit.

isnt that the truth?i dont think it should be a set way of who runs the relationship, it depends on each individual person. i know plenty of men who prefer 'wearing the pants', but i also know plenty of women. so in the end, it should be up to the couple and their personalities, right?

whatever works for them they should be glad to do it.

I might have read it wrong, but it didn't sound like craig was badmouthing single parents, just couples where the man isn't willing to take on his traditional resposibilities. It is not hard and fast, but in general men are better leaders, have better heads for math, etc. And women are generally better with children, cooking, and managing a household (actually, few men I know are up to the challenge a household represents) Now, if one aspect of this isn't his/her particular "thing", and the other enjoys it (i.e. a man cooking), then let them have at it.And from a spiritual viewpoint, the man is meant to be not necessarily the "head of the house" but the "spiritual leader."

men are better leaders and better in math? i would highly disagree with that, nobody can say who is better at what, that holds no truth

Craig, I totally understand where you're coming from but the thing is like I said before, I'm so used to not depending on anyone else (except for maybe mommy and daddy) that I would have a very hard time relying on anyone other than myself. I don't see a problem with a man staying at home and a woman working to support her family. With the field I'm getting into I don't think there would be a need for him to work unless he wanted to. I mean once I get my BSN I'm going to medical school to become an oncologist. And I wouldn't want a stranger watching my children and in the same respect I wouldn't want my husband earning 30,000 a year when I would be making almost 4x that. I know men have this thing about the women working and the men staying at home but I've met several men who are married, have kids, and are stay at home dads. Women have done it for years...I kinda think it's the man's turn for a while. I know that doesn't make any sense whatsoever but my thing is, I don't want to marry someone or be with someone who's going to try to tell me what to wear, or how and when to wear what. I wasn't created for that. And any man who thinks he's going to tame this wild horse has another thing coming. I've acted in plenty of situations where I was considered a bitch for defending myself and it doesn't really bother me. I've become quite fond of that nickname. It's better than some of the others I've heard my friends called.

In reply to: LMAO I’m saying nothing cuz if I do I’m soooooooooo going to get jumped on LMAO tell me tell me tell meee

i think my mom wears the pants in our house. that or she knows how to get her way. my dad wanted a hummer and she talked him out of it. but guess who ended up getting a new truck.....mom. lol females............. nevermind. this isn't a reply to anyone just a..well..a well this is wut i see in my house.my dad works 9 to when ever he usally gets home about 6 / 6:30 or 7. I know he works in the a/c all day and stuff but he has to put up with alot of shit. he's got a stressful job and then i don't help so he has more at home too. my mom works in the heat all day. but her job is more like a bobby for her. my dad comes in and sits his ass down in front of the tv. yeah but my mom is in and out and she's like a busy body or something. she cooks when she comes in for the night and we never know when that is. so most the time dad runs buy and picks up food. we get take out. alot. when it comes to the chores and junk. well that's y my parents had us kids. i wash my cloths or they don't get cleaned same with my bro and sis. i have to have certine things done b4 my dad gets in or he'll chew me out. i'm not sure who is the "boss" at my house. to me this is wut this thread looks like. debates over who is /or should be the "boss" of the house hold. another reson i don't want to get married btw, i read someone said somethign about men cooking. not sure wut it was about cuz i was more like skimming threw things (that's alot of stuff to read on) but i hear DiverDude is a mean cook.

In reply to: The fact that your mother was stupid enough to marry TWO losers in a row - doesn't make MY point 'stupid' OR 'sexist' And when it comes to a women being married to a man who "absolutely refuses to take responsiblity" - there is a solution to that. It's called DIVORCE . it's called go to my dad.

IF all of you re-read what I said - I think you'll see that I did NOT SAY what the male and female 'roles' are. [other than a male taking on the 'role' of protecting the couple from OUTSIDE threats] There has been a LOT of assuming going on in this thread - as to what was meant by 'wearing the pants'. Don't you think?!GREAT BIG HUGCraig!!

hummm Craig this is a interesting topic. but i'm going to stay out of it.