so I found out today that I may be an uncle. My brother's fiance is 2 months pregnant. They're waiting till after the first trimester to tell the extended fam. due to the possibility of a miscarriage.I though it was very exciting news, as did my parents. My girlfriend is currently obsessed with babies, so I thought she'd be very happy to hear the news too. But she wasn't really. She went on to remind me how she never wants kids, how her(bro's fiance) life is now basically over, and how she would be so unhappy if it were her.Now here's the problem. We're both 19, very young I know. But I mean, we've both considered the possibility that we could end up married one day. I try to avoid the discussion of it, because we're only 19, we shouldn't be talking about this kind of thing yet. Maybe if we make it through 4 years of a long term relationship (going to different colleges) we can talk about it, but not now.Still, I consider it. And this outlook has me concerned. If there's probably anything I've ever been 100% sure of about my future is that I want to be a father. I can't think of a greater honor or more rewarding thing to do, and I almost feel like the point of living is to eventually raise a family and ensure that they're lives are better than yours was. Like I said, I've got a long while to go before this is really an issue, but I mean, if she's 100% set on never having a child, then there's no way I can marry her ever, and it makes me wonder, why I should even continue through this difficult long distance relationship, forgoing the college expirience of hooking up, going to date functions, etc. for nothing in the end....Just a thought I needed to share with someone (who's not my g/f)
It is a very important issue, and if you both feel strongly about it in different directions, there would be much unhappiness if one deferred to the other. Children are very much life-changing, and you have to be completely committed to them; but if you want them, a childless life will seem empty.
My friend Jenn recently told me that before I move in/marry (etc) my boyfriend that we need to sit down and figure out what we want in life. I think you should do this too if children is something youre 100% sure of.Having children and how you want to raise them is a very important issue. She pointed this out to me about how her and her boyfriend didnt have this talk until after they got engaged and moved in together. It was a huge thing and they had a difference of opinion on ALOT of things.
Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same.