Gah what to do.

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Alright, so I'm 15, I've been having sex with my girlfriend for a year.Recently, she told someone that if I did get her pregnant she'd keep it. Ok here's the problem. For one I'm not mentally capable of something like that it'd completely destroy my life.In our situation we absolutely can not, regardless of help from the government support a baby.But I don't wanna tell her I'm not going to have sex with her because she just spent the money on morning after pills, and going to get some pill she has to get once a month or something for birth control.And after her spending all that money + the fact I've already fucked her for a year, I don't wanna just sit there and say. Ok, I know you just spent all that money, but! we're not gonna have sex anymore. at least not for 4-5 more years when we can support it if it happens and I have the mental capability for a kid.ugh what to do, should I just not worry about it or what.

So if she gets pregnant, she'll keep it, but she plans to use morning after pills?
Is she on the pill as well?

she's going to be

If YOU'RE not ready for a baby, stop having sex. She may have spent money on birth control but think about how much more you're going to need to support a baby (food, clothes, medical bills, ect). I'm sure there are other things you guys can do in your relationship besides have sex. Have you tried bowling? But I will say this: since she's doing the smart thing in getting birth control, you have a lesser chance in getting her pregnant. As long as she's on time with her pills AND you wear a CONDOM, you should be fine.However, crazier things have happened....

to stop having sex all at once for good is like telling a smoker they have to cold turkey even though they just bought 3 cartons of cigs.I'm just saying, it's a really shitty thing to do after we've had sex for a year with nothing but condoms and she buys extra protection (we're dirt poor as it is might I add) so spending extra money on protection that we really don't have, so I can tell her oh we're gonna stop having sex.Is a really shitty thing to do

If she is on oral contraception and you are using condoms, the chance of pregnancy is extremely low.I'm not sure what you are asking for. It seems that what you really have a problem with is that if precautions fail and your girlfriend gets pregnant, she intends to keep the baby instead of having an abortion or giving it up for adoption, and the idea of this remote possibility is not something you can cope with. So you feel you should stop sex, but at the same time you feel that would be terribly hard on you, so you feel aggrieved at your girlfriend.My view is that when two people have sex they take joint responsibility for it. That means that if there is a pregnancy it is a joint responsibility, and you shouldn't be having sex unless you can cope with this. I know that is a hard saying. I think you need more discussion with your girlfriend about this.

it's not just for me to stop having sex, but to cold turkey my gf from it after we've had it for a year now, sometimes 2-3x a day. now that she bothered to get extra protection. it's like.Her: I'm gonna get extra protection so I'm less likely to get pregnant.Me: Oh hey, I feel paranoid even though we've been fine for a year and you're upgrading protection, I think I'm not going to have sex with you anymore.And on top of that we've had sex less mainly because of my paranoia , but she thinks i'm losing interest in her even though I explained so I don't wanna fuck up our relationship by stopping everything.It's no so much as a relationship based off of sex, as much as a, we already have been doing it for so long, and now we're taking extra precautions, for me to step in and say, it is no more. is really wrong to do to her.

This may make me sound like a bad person, but you're making it seem like you're basing your entire relationship on sex. I wasn't kidding when I said you should do other things. Your relationship CAN survive without sex right now. You're still kids, after all. Originally Posted By: TheFallenLightto stop having sex all at once for good is like telling a smoker they have to cold turkey even though they just bought 3 cartons of cigs.Weak comeback. Don't you think quitting smoking in order to live a healthier life is worth more than a few wasted bucks on cigs? Plus, who said you had to give up sex for good? Damn dude, you're still kids. You still have the rest of your life to go. Like I said earlier, it's better to have spent all that money on protection rather for a baby. Originally Posted By: TheFallenLightshe buys extra protection (we're dirt poor as it is might I add) so spending extra money on protection that we really don't have, so I can tell her oh we're gonna stop having sex. Have you heard of Planned Parenthood? If money is such a big deal, go to them and they will help you out.In my honest opinion, you're not MENTALLY ready for sex anymore. If you're not ready for the possible outcome of a pregnancy, then you need to stop. What's more unfair than cutting off sex from your girlfriend is you leaving that baby with her, since you're too scared about your own life. And in my eyes, that's pretty damn selfish. So, I agree with Ineligible. If you're going to have sex, you need to take ALL the responsiblities that come with it.Talk to her about all this and see how she truely feels.

Quote:

If you're going to have sex, you need to take ALL the responsiblities that come with it.

Just because you **can ** do something doesn't mean that you **should **

Having sex is all about responsibility, not just getting your rocks off.

Originally Posted By: Virtual_StarThis may make me sound like a bad person, but you're making it seem like you're basing your entire relationship on sex. I wasn't kidding when I said you should do other things. Your relationship CAN survive without sex right now. You're still kids, after all. Originally Posted By: TheFallenLightto stop having sex all at once for good is like telling a smoker they have to cold turkey even though they just bought 3 cartons of cigs.Weak comeback. Don't you think quitting smoking in order to live a healthier life is worth more than a few wasted bucks on cigs? Plus, who said you had to give up sex for good? Damn dude, you're still kids. You still have the rest of your life to go. Like I said earlier, it's better to have spent all that money on protection rather for a baby. Originally Posted By: TheFallenLightshe buys extra protection (we're dirt poor as it is might I add) so spending extra money on protection that we really don't have, so I can tell her oh we're gonna stop having sex. Have you heard of Planned Parenthood? If money is such a big deal, go to them and they will help you out.In my honest opinion, you're not MENTALLY ready for sex anymore. If you're not ready for the possible outcome of a pregnancy, then you need to stop. What's more unfair than cutting off sex from your girlfriend is you leaving that baby with her, since you're too scared about your own life. And in my eyes, that's pretty damn selfish. So, I agree with Ineligible. If you're going to have sex, you need to take ALL the responsiblities that come with it.Talk to her about all this and see how she truely feels. actually it's a very strong come back, it's just you won't compare them. I'm not addicted to sex, but my girlfriend is.You know weather it's unhealthy or not cigs are addictive, and if you just spent 60 bucks when you didn't really have the money to start with, so you could keep smoking to staunch your addiction, while your cigs are right there in front of you. You're not going to just throw out your cigs you just spent 60 bucks on them, and besides you're addicted.The problem isn't me, it's her. I've already gone myself down to sex once a month, but she isn't happy with it. And I was too late to stop her from spending the money.She has been having sex for almost 6 years now, terrible story seeing her age, but the fact is she has, and one of those years were with me, she obviously craves it, and she got the protection making it supposedly near impossible to get her pregnant.would it really be right to take all that away over simply paranoia?Plus, even though if it's a good thing, I've stopped her from Cutting, smoking, smoking pot, drinking, drugs of all sorts. And sex as long as she doesn't get pregnant is good for her.And if you remember from other posts she is not active like at all. she was for awhile, but then once again fell to doing nothing. Sex is the only exercise activity she gets. without it, she'll end up becoming a blob D=.

Perhaps, then I suppose I have nothing more to add here.

TheFallenLight, one thing that seems to be missing is talking it over with her? Does she know your feelings about potentially being a father?

I'm with Ineligible. Talk to your girlfriend about your fears and concerns and see what happens. Try to see if there's a common ground you guys can agree on.She can live without sex at her age. And if she doesn't understand your feelings, then you gotta cut her off (from sex) for your sake.Good luck with this!

I think it’s cool of you to not want to chance something you know you can’t handle now. Your gf should respect you for it. I dk if you have talked to her about it or not. My gf would be cool with me if we stopped having sex. As long as she can grab my arm and kiss my cheat I swear she’s happy. (I’m talking on the no sex intement level here) Yea there are a lot of things u and her can do with out intercourse. Lot of intement things u can do with her with out fear of a baby coming. Your gf will understand it or she want and if she don’t then maybe she’s the one only in the relationship for sex. But you’ll never know till you talk to her.

the male pill maybe?

If she can't respect your concerns or wishes, then drop her like a hot stone. It will only get worst when your married! Women don't change. Nobody does for that matter.