Is sexsomnia real?

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ok so my bf came to visit this weekend, so as always we took this opportunity to sleep together(in pajamas). i just started a medication that causes me to get really dizzy and tired at night, so at one point i started to doze off while he was attempting to initiate something. the last thing i remember was him partially on top of me, giving up. i started having a bit of a strange dream after that, and then woke up in practically the same position, but realising slowly what was going on. it wasnt completely in, and the movements were dazed in a way, like a reflex. either way, when i came to that realisation, i freaked out, but only slightly (for me). i had to pretty much push him off me, and he asked what was wrong. i told him i couldnt believe that he was doing that while i was asleep and he went "doing what?" when i told him he seemed really surprised. he doesnt seem like a liar, and i do believe him, its just...was it sexual somnambulism? ive heard of it, but never had confirmation that it exists. also, should i go on the morning after pill, just in case?

You've got me really confused. You make a point that you are sleeping together "in pajamas." What is that supposed to indicate?Then the description of your dream and what was happening when you woke up. Did he ejaculate?

meaning that we were sleeping together in a non-sexual fashion, despite the term that people tend to use nowadays. and we were fully clothed, so it's not as though we were sleeping naked or in underwear or anything, making sexsomnia less likely. (i think)my dream was a figurative wet dream. i just dreamed that he kept on going, and when i woke up and checked my watch, it was about 2 hours after i checked my watch before going to bed. somehow, in the midst of the dream, it started to dawn on me that something was actually happening (i'm not sure if i was clear before, but basically he was having sex with me, but only about an inch or so in). i dont think he ejaculated, but i cant be sure. like i said, it was 2 hours after my last definite consciousness. a lot could have happened. i'm trying to comfort myself by thinking that he had just started and that was what woke me up, but i dont know if that's what actually happened. i did some research on the whole sexsomnia thing a while ago, and it sounds as though we're both in the demographic that is most likely to do that. on a side note, i dont have a lot of money, and have taken the plan b pill way too much already. also, i was on the last day of my period yesterday.

it is mostly a myth for the most part! sex dreams and all are real! but for what it "seemed" like was happening, was happening, because clearly he was in a position, and while your asleep is just wrong, and saying you didnt feel well and were dizy and he was trying to initiate something after (your other posts) saying you told him you didnt want to do sexual acts anymore, he sounds like the kind of people that deserve to go to jail!

while your sleeping is NOT OKAY! no matter how much it is in! Your boyfriend is LITERALLY a monster, and you really need to get out while you can! That is just disgusting and wrong of him in so many levels!

It does seem to be a phenomenon that has been clinically observed, a variant of sleepwalking. That doesn't necessarily mean what happened in your case was an example of it. Does he have a history of sleepwalking?There's a brief article at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep_sex, and a useful full article from the Canadian Journal of Psychiatry, written by the original researchers in the area, at http://ww1.cpa-apc.org:8080/Publications/Archives/CJP/2003/june/shapiro.asp. There are abstracts of reviews by other groups of researchers here and here and here.

Whether or not anything happened will probably never be known.However, let me answer your concern first. Plan B is to prevent pregnancy. The chance of pregnancy while on your period is rather small. And, if you were both clothed, the chance of penetration is (for all practical purposes) zero.Now, I agree that for him to attempt penetration while you were sleeping and knowing your position that you were not ready for sex is pretty low. I'd be thinking long and hard about this relationship.

hemlock- i know it sounds really bad, and could potentially BE really bad. i did change my mind before this weekend, though, about the sex, so long as things between us are still better and we use protection the whole time. now we're just doing a "once in a while" basis.
and i no while im sleeping isnt ok...reminds me way way too much of "a little piece of heaven", in the beginning...its just that he seemed really sincere about not being conscious and i know he wouldnt try to do that (if so, then i really don't know him at all)

ineligible- i think he does, actually. i know that sometimes when he has a nightmare he ends up getting hurt somehow, physically. so him ending up having sex while asleep doesnt seem like much of a hurdle. and thanks for all the links, u r truly awesome

readytogo- thanks, i guess i wont take plan b then.u no, i actually didnt think much about the whole clothing thing. it does make me wonder a bit. how would my pj pants end up open like that, and his too? it does seem a bit fishy. i dont want to think about the alternative, if i am to be honest. but i think i have to

seems like excuses. and whether he was concious or not, u dont want to be with a guy that has that kind of sleeping problem! still a disgusting crime. and being sincere about not being concious isnt enough, becuase if thats true, thats something to be scared of because who knows what else hed "do" and not be concious!

you say you keep telling him about safe sex and its not okay without protection, yet you constantly have to keep taking the plan b pill, or always have a fear that your going to need an abortion or you could be pregannt is something you really need to think to yourself about. Its okay to be sexually active, but if you constantly keep telling him ONLY WITH CONDOMS, yet you keep having to take these other measures because he doesnt listen or to keep thinking your pregnant, clearly means this guy is not for you or does not take your sexual wants (protection) into account!

Where I come from, we call that rape.

actually, he now understands that condoms are a must, and automatically assumes i wont have sex any other way. its cut down on my stress a lot. his too, really, since he no longer has to deal with the guilt and monetary cost.

should have understood before! and with all the stress, and scares youve been having because of him: my advice if your going to stay with him, stop having sex for a while, maybe a couple months (6-12), if he loves you and its more then sex, he will say nothing but "OKAY" without trying to bargain or anything else

good idea, hemlock. thanks

if he says no, you can always threaten to call the police, after all it is a felony in all states!

From what you described, he's trying to take advantage of you while you're asleep, & ready to deny it. If you're not sexually active during waking hours & don't want to become involved with him in that way, sleeping beside him is dangerous & you ought not to continue doing it. One of these times, you'll be sufficiently unconscious for him to have his way with you & you might never realize it. Think about if you want that scenario to even be a possibility