ok i am in a complicated situation. Theres this girl at school that i like, i'm not afraid to ask her out at all and want to do it really bad. but i've never had a gf b4 and i know that my parents dont want me to have one. i'm 15 btw. but the reason that my parents don't want me to have one is that they r afraid that my grades will go down.... i mean WTF! if it was because they r afraid that i'll get an std or get some girl preg, i can understand, but their reason is that it's going to take up time that i could be doing schoolwork!!! also, if i ask this girl out who should provide a ride? our parents or wut?
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Parents vs gf
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This is actually quite a common parental worry, especially in Asian families, which tend to put an especially high value on good academic grades.Personally I think social skills are at least as important.If you ask a girl out you can't expect your parents to necessarily provide transport. Many do, but since yours are so against the idea, it's not likely they'll agree. You'll have to work out your own transport. Is she in walking distance? Cycling distance? Public transport?
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haha yes i'm asian, and i have no idea where she lives....
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ok well i get the transportaion part, but how will i get my parents to agree with this? is it a good idea to just say i'm going with a friend?
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In my own family, my kids know they are not allowed ot date till they are 16.the worry your grades will slip is a real concern, alot of kid goto shit after a girl, spend all thier time with her and grades goto hell.in your own case you need to find out where she lives, and besides that, does she share the same feelings? maybe your whole scheme will be fist fucked by the fact she doesnt like you.Worrie about the other shit after you find out if there is a reason to care.
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i'm just making sure that i can acually go out on a date before i ask her out....
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why not uncomplicate the situation by setting up with the girl to be study buddies. That way, the two of you can spend some time together and both keep yoru marks up, expecially if you do the studying at your place. It will give your parents a chance to ge to know her and realize she is as dedicated to academics as they expect you to be (and hopefully as dedicated as you actually are). Also, once your parents are comfortable with the two of you spending time together studying, they might relax a bit and feel it is okay for the two of you to spend a bit of leisure time together going to a movie or for a burger.I know it's not quite the ideal way to 'date' at first but far better to be able to spend time together and keep both sets of parents happy (can be loosely translated as 'off your back') while the two of you get to know each other and see if you even want to date in the usual way.
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Ask her out?
why do that?
just talk to her, if shes interested, youll know it soon enough, then you can ask her out, my christ its nto like you met her ina bar and have to ask her out now or risk never seeing her again, you goto school with her, ftalk to her, get to know her, hang out some, you can ask her out when you have an idea of how its going to go.
And Helms is right, fyour putting way to much effort into it, shit like this either works out or doesnt and the more effort you put into it, the more likely it is to fail. -
yeah i think helmsman is right, i don't want to do that, but i think he knows wut he's talkng about, the study budy is good too, but it migh tbe too much.
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oh wow. my mom doesn't want me to have a bf till after college and my dad wants me to "wait till after I'm married" lol and grades are big deal to them. I think you should give it some time. If the girl likes you go for it. But make sure you keep your mind on your studies. Try not to wander too far. And if she can't respect that then . good luck
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kk i think helmsman got the bullseye on this one, but i'l have to disagree on 1 thing. if you just hang around a girl and don't make any obvious signs that you like her, wouldn't u be thought of as just a friend? and then ur really screwed
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i have a pretty good idea of wut this girl is like..... no totally sure, but i'm taking ur advice 4 now.