Help! Im In love with My Best Friend

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alright more to this saga, even though it's a little old.

Ok so we basically made up really nice and everything was going great. I was cool still being best friends because of course i dont want to lose here. We got even closer after getting through this last little tiff.

Ok so her and her boyfriend started having major troubles, stemming from his drug use, and we talked about it a lot, her parents eventually forced her to break up with him, and then she went into a crazy depression like state.

I tried to be there for her but she really pushed me away, in very hurtful ways, she was just down right mean to me on numerous occasions. I'm a major worry wart and i like to make sure people i care about are ok, i also know they need space, but it makes me feel more at ease if i can at least say something to them. But basically she went off on me one day for checking up on her, and i'm suprised i didn't fall to tears on the phone with her, i just said sorry and hung up.

She apologized later that night, but she continued to be quite distant and down right bitchy to me. Our dance classes were hard to get through because of her negativity and such. I finally talked her into talking about things to help releave some of the pain, and we basically skipped a whole class to talk. She seemed much better.

she still distanced her self from me a bit in the later days, but the other night we met up and talked and she was very sorry. She basically said she hadn't been herself, and i gladly excepted her apology. She then basically claimed that she was going full Lesbian(she was formerly bi). She said she just wasn't into guys anymore, and I was cool with this, i just wanted her to be happy again, that in itself made me happy. So after some more talking we went our separate ways.

Then Today she calls me to tell me something, she tells me about hooking up with one of her ass hole exes(a guy), and it just literally ripped right through me.

I was dumbfounded i thought she just became a lesbian? then all my feelings which seemed to be in remission for ahwile hit me again harder.

I just wondered How the hell is she going to give this guy who was a total prick to her a second chance, when a guy like myself had been there for her in every aspect when ever she needed me had never even gotten one. She claimed they were going to be Just friends with benefits or whatever, but then i recalled a conversation with me she had, where she said she could never have friends with benefits because of the feelings involved. So i was just stupified.

I mean I love this girl with all my heart as a friend, but then there are also my romantic feelings for her which go through repressed states but then explode out again.

I'm actually fairly certain im what was mentioned earlier in this thread, as a possible step above cuddle bitch, she actually trusts me and says that she does indeed love me. But if so you think she'd realize how much that kind of stuff hurts me.

Sorry i just really felt the need to get this off my chest, it just freaking sucks to be in this position.

When she is forced to break up with someone by her parents, of course she will be angry and will react against that. She will not want to start seeing someone else straight away, and when she does, she'll choose someone her parents will dislike even more. She won't choose you, because you are too close to the parents she is angry with, and your attitude of worrying about her is too like her parents'.I can't see your relationship going anywhere. She'll always like you to be there when she needs you, but you are not the type she is looking for as a boyfriend.

aaaaaaaand once in the friend zone, there is only a 10% chance of gettin' out.

Sadly i believe you all are right, i just can't get over her though, it's tough, and it's not like she's the only girl iv'e talked to, iv'e tried to find other girls, but i can't find any of them that i can really clique with. I just dont know But thanks for all the info help and opinions from everyone.I dont ever want to lose her friendship she means the world to me.But im sick and tired of being alone and being used as a throw rug to walk at times it seems ya know?

There is another girl out there for ya, there always is hon. You really should try to...i dunno, distance from her if you want to get over her. Or if you want to make the dive, in a few weeks tell her how you feel.

Thanks again everyone much appreciated, im feeling a lot better now that i was just able to VENT! a little lol.But yes again thanks to all the advice given on this topic, I just need to get out there and find me a sweet girl who wants to love me as much as i want to love her Wish me luck!

just so you know, you weren't in love with her. give what you receive. if she doesn't give a shit about you, you do the same. the same as a reciprocal fraction. just like that. don't be adamant to simply give everything without receiving in kind. keep a cool head. with that you don't need luck. it will come to you, victory loves prudence.

Quote:just so you know, you weren't in love with her. Sometimes, love can truly be one sided.

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But im sick and tired of being alone and being used as a throw rug to walk at times it seems ya know?

There have been many nice guys in the world that have said the same thing. I know what you mean. I got tired of feeling like a doormat and changed. I noticed that the more I learned to respect myself, the more others respected me. It is interesting to see how doing something for yourself internally will change things externally.