The hardest thing I've had to endure.

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lol. yeah, females can be really confusing. Most females feel that their emotions should be implied and known to what they want. Men are more like say what you want so I know. Bottom line, women are emotional and men a verbal.

I'm not going to spend any time away. I've done that before and almost lost her completely. But in your case, it may be a good idea because I've done that before to girls I've dated and things turned out fine. At the same time, this girl is the only one i've ever fallen in love with. Are you in love with her?

Odelia, I can't quite agree with you in your analysis here. A girl who expects a guy to move with her when she moves, just so she can have a surrogate brother, doesn't have a good idea about what is reasonable to expect. If you move to another city, you can't expect family members to move to be with you, you can't expect friends to move to be with you. About the only people you can hope to move with you is an employee, a spouse, or an intended spouse.

I think this girl is using websexinfo. She doesn't seem to have his interests at heart, only her own.

Trust me - guys can be just as confusing.... You may think, "No - females are definitely much more complicated," but it's obviously easier to understand a male if you ARE a male and vice versa. ...And not all guys are verbal. A lot of guys don't say how they feel at all and then you're just left in the dark completely...As for both of your situations... again, as harsh as this sounds, in both cases, it just sounds like the girl isn't interested. So you either deal w/ your feelings and stay friends... or back off. But I don't think either of you should back off so much that you cut the girl out (not saying either of you were planning this.. just saying)... Because if she's special enough for you to have these intense feelings, then you should want to keep her in your life. I could understand if there was a history w/ a relationship in either case... but there hasn't been. If it's that painful, then I suppose, stop talking to her... but keep in mind, after high school, things are very different anyway... Some people you planned on keeping in touch with for the rest of your life may fade out after a year or two anyway.

Actually, she's my ex. Same girl I always talk about. There are really no others in my life. She told me that's the reason why I have strong feelings for her. But I had strong feelings for her when there were a bunch of girls around.I'll keep her as a friend. She agreed she'd back off a little. And even more when I get a girlfriend. So I'm happy with it. If I get a girlfriend though, there will be a lot less time with my ex because I'm a very one girl kind of person. Not sure how cool she'll be with that, but tough cookie.

Sounds like a good plan.

Hyperion - have you figured out what you're going to do yet?

I want to talk to her. But I'm afraid of what will come of it. I genuinely care very deeply about her and I consider her one of my closest friends but lately...I dunno.... we've drifted apart and thats probably the worst of all.Like I'm getting over the fact we're not going to date and I want to get back to the way things were (friendship), and the two of us went shopping with friends today and she was a little bit better but she was still closer to the other guys then she was me. To bring you up to speed: the other 2 girls are dating the other 2 guys in our group, so it's me, this girl I've had trouble with, and my best bud who are still single. Thats the group I hang out with. Now she, and her girlfriends, have said she doesn't desire a relationship with anyone right now. Her thinking is "It's only high-school" I got lots of time. Yet I am sensing she might like the other single guy in our group. I talked to her girlfriend about it and she said "NO!" less then a milli-second after I asked if she did in fact like the guy. Now the fact the answer was so fast sort of alarmed me, as if she was covering for her girlfriend or something. I also asked the guy I think she likes and I guess he has had on-and-off feelings about her for the last couple years but mentions it was nothing serious or anything. Judging by how they answered and the way they reacted I can't help but think something is going on.I don't know if I'm just building all of this up in my head or what but I'm very worried. I've never had this happen. If they hook up I would definitely leave the group. There is no way I could handle the humility. Ms. "I don't want a relationship with anyguy" runs off with my best-bud not more then a month after she had so delicately flattened my pride. We've been wanting to go to grad together since before Christmas but if she likes this other guy I'll run off to Kingston RMC before grad and let them go together. Hard to describe wut I'm feeling, take "Heart-broken, depressed, angry, betrayed, and parnoid" all in the same head and you got me. So in short, I probably will talk with her on the weekend in person or over the phone sometime this week. I just have to find a way to approach that problem, any suggestions on that?

Well, mate, I dont know much in ways of advice on this one..its tough ...but I did want to mention that your words..they are like poetry....I looked at the length and I was like WHOA but then when I read it, i couldnt stop it was fabulous..lol..I dunno...maybe cuz its late

Dude, I know EXACTLY how you're feeling right now. I was with a group of friends traveling up state on a bus. When we got there she didn't talk to me hardly at all, even avoided sitting next to me, and ended up talking to my best friend. Talk about hurt. On the way back it was about 12am when we started back home and for 5 hours I sat on that bus and let all kinds of stuff flow through my head, didn't even sleep. The next day, I called up my best and asked him if he liked her, if she liked him, and if he didn't tell me what all was exchanged between them I would blow his brains out with my 12 gauge. fast forward: Turns out, she didn't like him at all. Maybe as a friend. But since me and her were in a rut, she depended on asking and talking to my best friend about me.My friend told me she needed space and that she felt suffocated. So, I gave exactly what she wanted. I avoided her since she was avoiding me. After about a month, I saw her again at the college. I walked her to her car. She gave me a ride to my car because I parked behind the building and she parked in front. Before I got out, I talked to her. She said that she missed me. I apologized and told her that I was addicted to her and I needed some time off. But now I was ready to be the friend she needed. When getting out of the car, I looked back and she had her arms open, "you've given me a hug every time you've seen me for like 3 years, you just can't quit." So, i gave her a hug and went our ways. That was the start of an unexpectedly powerful friendship. The only problem was, I wasn't over my "addiction" yet. And now I'm battling with falling out of love with her.Hope this helps

I'm gonna have my friends do recon I guess. One will watch and see hows she is around this guy and vice-sersa. One will figure out what I did wrong. And the other will figure out why she is uncomfortable around me.

If I have at least a small understanding of what she is going through I can at least approach her on common ground.

I really really want us to go back to the way we were. :frowning: