Underwear party: it sounds worse than it is

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I just got back from a kick ass party. It was an underwear party. I wore a black bra, panties, black heels, thigh highs and garter belt. All the guys thought I looked really hot.

There was a creepy guy who kept being possisive and rubbing all over me. So I danced with this other guy, who was a real gentleman, and was a karate buff, so I knew the creepy guy wouldn't bother me. I stopped dancing with him though becuase I felt like I was leading him on, and I didn't want to do that, becuase he was a really nice guy.

After the party I talked to the nice guy, and we have each other's names, he stops by my dept. (at school) sometimes, and he said that he'd see me some time next week.

the only thing is, I have a boyfriend whom I love dearly and I'd be lost without. But I can't help thinking about this amazingly articulte, hot, sexy, romantic, graceful adonis of a man.

My boyfriend is enderingly pear shapped, doesn't really care much about anything except video games, and me. He still lives iwht his family and is 21. He's sweet, and I love him, adn we've been through a good number of tough times, and he's my main suppport system.

I can't imagine my life without him, and yet I can't stop thinking about this other guy.

I know this is wrong, but I'm not going to act on it. And no matter how impressed he was with my dancing, or my looks, (or my lingerie) I don't think it would mean anything serious. It was just for fun at a party one night.

anyone have any insights on this. I feel really badly about this, and I don't want to lie to my bf but at the same time I don't want to hurt him by saying there was a guy I danced with that I was attracted to.

help please.

I say go with your feelings. If you suspect a problem then there probably is so it may be time to break up and move on.

Yeah. I agree. It's harsh but I feel sorry for your existing boyfriend seeming like a "2nd best" to this other guy.You need to analyse whether you'd be happier with your current guy or this other one. Do you just like this new guy cos of his looks? If so, which is more important to you, looks or personality?Whatever you do, don't be harsh to your existing boyfriend. He sounds like he doesn't deserve to be hurt.

Ohh, I must admit underwear parties are fun. I must admit that they're basically orgys. Oh well, some have an underwear fetish. You must go there single, I know that much. hehe

I take a different view - this might just be a case of the grass looking greener on the other side of the fence. You don't really know this new guy very well yet, and he has the bloom of novelty.

Ohh, I must admit underwear parties are fun. I must admit that they're basically orgys. Oh well, some have an underwear fetish. You must go there single, I know that much.I think that's basically true. You have to ask yourself why, if you're in a relationship, you'd go to an underwear party alone.

I didn't go alone. I went with my friend. The only reason I went was becuase she wanted to go, it was a party some of her friends' friends were throwing, and I didn't want her going by herself. I didn't really intedend to dance with anyone, just with her and with groups of people. I don't go to parties as a general rule.

By "alone", I meant "stag"; without your boyfriend. Would you have attended an actual orgy if you friend had ivited you?> I didn't really intedend to dance with anyone...But you did...

If my friend had told me she was going to an oragy I would have told her not to go.The thing was, I was attracted to this guy before we started dancing. And I danced with him so that the really creepy guy wouldn't dance with me.The reason I didn't go with my bf, is because he is two hours away. I told him I was going to the party though, and that I wouldn't drink, which I didn't. I wasn't pretending that this guy was my bf and dancing with him like I would my bf.

If my friend had told me she was going to an oragy I would have told her not to go.I'm sure you would have told her that, but the point is that an underwear party, while a fine thing, is one or two steps down from an orgy. It ususally has a sexually-charged atmosphere, and things tend to, uhh, happen at them. I doubt that the guy who was bothering you would have been bothering you the same way at a cocktail party.Your posts here and here make me think that there's an issue with your current relationship, like you're bored with it; it's comfortable but not exciting. And that going to the underwear party was not completely an accident.The bottom line is that you need to weigh the pluses and minuses, and figure out whether you're getting what you need from your current relationship.

You said, "My boyfriend is enderingly pear shapped, doesn't really care much about anything except video games, and me."At college you are around high powered people who are gifted and have long term goals in life. Perhaps you are moving out of his sphere and meeting more higher powered people. This is not to say that there is anything wrong with your boyfriend, it is to say that you are moving socially and emotionally at different speeds and now other boys are looking attractive. It is nothing wrong for you to have these feelings.

thanks for your help, but I think it's prolly just an infatuation. I'm not used to being payed attention to and having someone appreciate and comment upon how I dance, and how I look. It was very refreshing, and it just went to my head. It'll wear off in a bit.

thanks for your comments all the same.

Just about every post about your boyfriend is a backhanded slap at him. He's a nice guy, but he's obvioulsly not giving you what you now need. Do you see him becoming more interesting to you?

Seriously, that relationship is doomed. The thing at the underwear party just drove home the point.

Yah, I agree.

I would agree with that, too. From what it seems like, you just don't really enjoy having your boyfriend there anymore. Maybe, you should go looking for some more excitement in your lovelife.

sigh...i wanna go to an underwear party, or any party, just one damn party

same here..............................lol haha any party would be nice

sigh... i dont ever get a dam birthday party for myself because my family is poor and we live in a small ass apartment building that can barely bit 4 ppl in it. I'll just wait till im 19 so i can control my own life without my parents go out with my buddies and get drunk or even start a party

Yes, and by doing that, you are obviously going to be successful in your life and provide better care for your children.

Presuambly he doesn't plan to make that a permanent lifestyle choice. From what I saw in college, the people who had the most "repressed" childhood are the ones who went the most crazy in college. Police officers' kids were some of the craziest of all.