Just blowing off... steam

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OK so here's the thing.

I am in a committed relationship with a wonderful man. There are lots of great people in my life. But... gosh... I have never done anything WILD... my ID has never come out to play. I've never had a one night stand, or kissed a man other than my long distance fiance, or done anything even remotely rebellious. I'm a little goody two shoes and I'm so RESTLESS! There's a acquaintance of mine... I guess maybe I have a little crush on him but I just want to FCUK him really, really hard and get all this pent up frustration out of my body. I've had sex maybe once a year since I started a few years ago (no joke). I'm fixated on this guy like he's the answer, but I think really I just need to get all of this sexual ENERGY out of my body.

Before you start telling me to dump my fiance, I'm deeply in love with this person. He's wonderful... I just can't be with him right now. We are worlds apart and I'm just so lonely over here. When I make love to him I practically injure him, I'm so excited. I have a fairly normal sex drive, maybe slightly higher than normal since I have repressed so much of it over the years (strict religion). But lately when I'm with him I can't get this other person out of my MIND. This guy is almost like the personification of my ID - that being that never came out of me and to do some damage. I'm definitely not in love with my acquaintance... I just need to... UGH, I don't know.

I would ask if it would be so WRONG to just sleep with this person and get it over with... but he doesn't know I'm alive anyway. He probably thinks I'm a conservative nerd, if he thinks of me at all. But I just want to get all this SEXUAL FRUSTRATION out of myself! Any ideas? UGHHH! :blush:

All I can say is, put yourself in your fiance's shoes, and then decide what's right.Why do you and you fiance have to be separated for so long?

I would ask if it would be so WRONG to just sleep with this person and get it over with... you already know the answer to that one, yes.

I think you already know the answer or you wouldn't be asking for a "blessing" from someone on this board to be unfaithful to your boyfriend. What if he called you and said he had all this "sexual energy" that he needed to expel and was going to get off with another girl whereever he is? What would be your response to him? How far away is he? Is there no was for the two of you to get together?

Hey you guys I'm not looking for a blessing to cheat on my boyfriend, perhaps I didn't make it very clear at all (I was very frustrated last night after all) that I actually really don't want to do that. It's just that the situation sucks right now. No I can't be with him more often, we live in two different states, and financially we can't live together just yet, but trust me I've been holding a lot in for a good long while now and it's starting to get to me. I thought I'd get some ideas or understanding from a board that seems to have advice for all kinds of unacceptable impulses (come on... having sex with your brother?? wtf) - I feel a bit attacked here. What, no one's ever felt just a bit confined in their relationship here? I DON'T want to cheat on my boyfriend (never have never will!!), but I feel like I'm in a catch 22 - I really and truly don't want to break up with him because I love him deeply, but all the usual sex stuff we do (doing it a few times a year, phone sex, webcam stuff) is not satisfying me anymore. I guess I was just blowing off some steam... maybe I need another outlet for my sexuality. I wonder if there is such a thing as sex energy transmutation?

What can i sai, shitty situation, but cheating is just not it. Ive been a cheater (and im telling you, once a cheater always a cheater isnt true!) and how you will feel afterwards isnt worth it. Get going with yourself instead, buy a nice, tingly vibrator and g e t i t o n ! !

Well Ill give you some advise that you really dont want.Do it.If your seriously contemplating this then maybe your just not ready to be married and are fearing that very thing.Think about it.Other people have come to that same conclusion. One here on this board very recently in fact.

Id say break up before she does it... not fair to the fiancee.

I wasn't with the guy for two years though...

God adam was a bore when it came to sex though. All he ever wanted to do was missionary. thats it. *rolls eyes* Its no wonder it didn't work out with him.

Anyways, anonima Are you sure you want to get married? I know im going to get screamed at for this, but i agree. Do it. But, don't be with your fiance at the same time. I think you need to weigh out if you even really want to be anyones fiance. I don't know how old you are, but if your like me I don't plan on getting married ANY time soon, but then again im 20 and i have to much aspiration to get tired down.

If your absolutely 100% sure no questions asked, this is the man you are going to spend the rest of your like with and never SERIOUSLY contemplate an affair, Don't go find another fella, but if you are i would think about if you want to be so tied down to a man a state away.

Well, there is no such thing as a wrong decision if its what she wants... but well... I guess i can agree with do whatever you want, but take the consequences.. she might get over it, might not, might take time, might not. I know that fi i cheated on my fiancee it would probably be like cutting my own heart out. But ive cheated like... a lot on other partners i had, so i know you get over it.. but its a hard punch to yourself.. or.. whatever. i give up :P

It doesnt matter if its been 2 months or two years.You make my point very well java, better then I did when I tried to make it.Its not how long you v been iwth them its if they ar what you want and if your happy. If you are happy I dont think youd be contemplating someone else. I dont mean fantasy, I think fantasy is fine, but if your really thinking about fucking someone else.......

Thats what my problem with adam was, after a week sleeping with him i kept wondering what it would be like to seriously sleep with like every attractive guy i saw. Now that isnt healthy if you plan on getting married *laugh*

Now, Greg, if and when you read this, that doesnt happen with you.

Man i hate have my fella on here now lol

Heheh i only have my 'brother in law' here :P My man isnt allowed :P

Hmm.. things to think about. LOL I won't cheat on my fiance, I have a pretty strong moral code so I feel like shit for even feeling like this. I wonder if I'm some kind of nympho. :-( I'm 27 and we've been together for 6 years. I'm actually not too sure I'm ready for marriage, but if I do get married then I absolutely would want it to be him. It's like I met the right person at the wrong time in my life... sigh. Sex is OK. I'm not a freak by any means - I mean we do slightly different positions, not always on the bed, but we aren't exactly using whips and chains or peeing on each other (that would just freak me out). It's just that doing it once a year, six years after you start is not easy, folks. I'd be better off never having done it at all. I just crave contact when I can't have any. no biggie

nice sig, by the way. goes well with the sarcasm.

Once a year??holy hell, I recomend a sex trip across the world in 80 days.screw one new person in every land you visit.

You know... a vibrator may not be a bad idea. Sometimes, tho, you just want, like, a man... but I can get over that ... I wonder if there are vibrators that don't look like vibrators for ladies who live with other people? :blush: :scream_cat:

yeah there sure is. Just clitorisvibrators can look like a lipstick and so on. An dthere are vibrators that doesnt look like one at all.

Your not a nympho, your just not 70 years old. Sex is a really big part of a relationship (if you have included sex in that relatioship) Your fiance' has to be craving it too no doubt. It has to be really trying and difficult for you both. One of three things can happen : You will get married and have a awful sex lifeYou will get married and have a really active sex life (Mind you have to tell him what you want, or it will be just the same sex over and over again)You will split, and find new people.