How would you like the boards improved?

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In reply to: Sorry about that; I didn't mean for what I said to sound like I'm being a bitch. I'm not in a really good mood. It's been a really shitty weekend. Sorry to hear you're having a bad weekend. Take a long bath with some Enya, maybe sip some wine and it'll help caress the cares away I know there's not much of a weekend left but I hope it gets better!

No, not much of a weekend left. Tomorrow, I have to get up and head to Atlanta to participate in Aids Walk Atlanta. That'll take up my whole Sunday, so I'll have to rush back here, do my homework, massive amounts of reading, and start on the newspaper. It's going to suck.

In reply to:"There are some really mean people here. Im afraid to share some of my issues and ask for advice for fear of them using it against me as they have done to other people countless times. I wish this was a safer place"i second that....there were so many times that i wanted to put my two cents forth...but i was afraid of being told off or insulted These boards are anoynomus unless you decide to reveal your identity thus if someone did say something nasty it really wouldnt matter because they dont know who you are which is the fantastic thing about this site. Someone could come on and post about something horrible or disgusting they could never tell anyone and get advice without anyone knowing their identity.I really dont see why anyone would be worried about asking for advice at a place where NO ONE would ever know who you were.

i just HATE people being mad at me... i duno..i know its anonymous,but even so, it bothers me if someone doesnt like me.

People have no idea who you are. If you're that sensitive about people liking a persona on an Internet message board, life will be difficult.In real life, not everyone will like you, no matter how wonderful you are. Such is the human condition. You need to like yourself. Your opinion of yourself and your worth can't be based on the postings of some anonymous message board posters, some of whom might be crazy.

i know that..i just dont like it. i try REALLY hard to get people to like me."Your opinion of yourself and your worth can't be based on the postings of some anonymous message board posters, some of whom might be crazy. "and im not gonna disagree with that

> i try REALLY hard to get people to like me.

I don't! I just say what I think. It may not always be pretty or nice, but it's honest.

thats a good thing..im just really insecure and i dont really like myself all that much, so i figure if people like me..at least someone does =/

you're not alone in that. I am the same way. I've been getting better, but I am still very cautious in the things I say...so alot of times I just won't post something if I think I'm going to make a fool or an ass out of myself. I've learned I can't just rely on saying whatever is on my mind.

i just HATE people being mad at me... i duno..i know its anonymous,but even so, it bothers me if someone doesnt like me. Ok I can totaly relate to that. Most of the time I don't take anything people say on here to personally because I know I shouldn't and that stupid. But occasionally I'm just in a very self destructive mood and then something someone says will really get to me.That's ok though, It only takes afue hours for me to get over it and realise I was being silly.But I do agree with what some people have said above that sometimes I just don't say anything because I think I might get attacked by some one else for my oppinion.

same here hunni hugs

mhmm i know what you mean...the way i see it is that "some things are better left unsaid" its dumb..but its me. i just dont wanna check my email and see sum rude comment in there directed to me..it makes me sad

dont mean to sound too forward leelee...but you are VERY pretty. blush (and no im not hitting on you or anything)

The above post is an example of hostility expressed. How it affects the board is debatable, but there it is.

A hallmark of intelligence is to be able to simultaneously hold two ideas in one's mind that are seemingly in opposition and make sense of them.

The forum is a good place for some people to express their anger and frustration. One can argue about whether the poster's gain outweighs the loss to others (I know how Pete feels about utilitarianism).

I like cake.

That wasn't hostle? And the follow-up wasn't hostile? I see...Well, if you think I'm two-faced, and you think that's bad, you might want to have a discussion about it with the administrative staff; maybe you can get me banned. But you really ought to step back and see how some of your posts come across.

First of all, your posts were hostile. There are ways to point out things without hostility. If anger is your thing, that's fine, but don't be in denial.Secondly, I'm not on anyone's side. I would think that would be clear by now. If I agree with a bunch of people on one issue today, I may disagree with them on another issue tomorrow, and I'm not going to lie about it to be buddy-buddy or cliquish.I don't think you understood what I mean in the post you first replied to, so let me clarify. Alan Keyes, a black candidate for the 2000 Republican presidential primary provides a perfect example. After the primaries ended (he didn't do very well), he was interviewed on the radio, and he spent some time complaining about how badly and unfairly he was treated because of his race. Then, without missing a beat, he started blasting homosexuals, using terms reminiscent of the way racist whites used to talk about blacks. He was in fact a religious bigot who was very sensitive about his own treatment.See what I'm saying? Telling someone that they're a nigger or a faggot is not the same thing as telling them (even emphatically) that they're wrong.

In reply to:No, you weren't talking about Alan Keyes.You were talking to JapanFan about something she said.I said "example"; the parallels were very close. I don't know how I can make it any clearer. Part of our issues seems to be that you prefer that things be stated in a way that everything is literally true, but if you can't make connections, it's hard to come up with new knowledge. We're not even talking "metaphor" here (I didn't say that JapanFan is Alan Keyes; is it OK to say that someone's behavior is like another persons in a certain way?)Don't deny hostility. I didn't say to stamp it out. Just recognize it. Have a nice trip.

Hmm.. lets be more strict!!I didnt read the thread because I have a big test to study for tomorrow.. my canadian securities exam! Eek!How about...1. If any thread goes off topic.. it should be locked immediately..and..2. If anyone insults or puts down another member.. they should be banned for 24 hours.

I enjoy discussing with Steve because he can actually see more than one side of an argument, as can I.
I don't enjoy discussing with someone who is blind to all ideas other than there own.

So, back to improvong the boards...
It's totally pointless to suggest that we somehow stop people from being "mean" to each other. It's almost as foolish as if we need to stop people from being nice to each other
The bottom line question to the mods, admins and owner is; will this board support fredom of speech or not?
I've seen too many arguments on this board with people expresssing their own veiw of free speech and therefor supporting thier own agenda. Where is the logic in defending one person's right to make an offensive statement then decry another person for taking the original poster to task over it?
I defy ANYONE to make a logical argument to defend that!

Where does that leave us? I think we have to get back to tangeble changes we can make (yes, broken record time, sorry). New sections is one thing. CR's and my suggestions seem to have received a positive response. It might be worthwhile looking at a few of the exsisting sections and breaking them down into some sub-sections.
Repairing, replaceing MySQL would make everyone happy, I'm sure. Turning the image tags back on would be nice. I think there are MORE than enough mods to catch anything offensive (and I think the good kids have been grounded long enough because of what the bad kids did).

And if there needs to be any more discussion on content and conduct, which I don't think there does but I'll say this anyway, I suggest that when a user violates any of the terms of use, a mod or admin should just PM the user with a copy of what he posted followed by a copy of the section of the rules he violated... as a simple, polite but direct admonition.

am I making sense yet?