There's this girl i really like

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I'm in high school, and there's this girl I really like. The problem is that I don't know her, and I don't know where to find her to talk to her, or what to say. I mean, it would be weird to just walk up to her and say hi, since I don't know her that well. To those of you who think it wouldn't be weird, I don't think you understand the situation. Also, I probably would have some of the same classes as her, except that I'm gr. 11 and she's gr. 10. She's a great person, really nice. She's quite athletic, and she's good looking, although that's not my reason for liking her.I first saw her at a fencing practice (yes, with the thin swords), and I thought I recognized her from elementary school - this was earlier this year. She was in the class after mine (so I saw her briefly at the end of class), and she hasn't been doing it for as long as I have. I didn't fall for her then, but I was pretty sure I knew who she was - and incase you need to know, I didn't really know her personally in elementary school. It wasn't until the summer that I said anything to her, although I think she recognized who I was before then.During the summer I had a fencing camp (not really a camp, but a week of fencing lessons and training), and she was in it. It was there that we talked a little, and I kind of started to like her, but it was nothing big. I wish I would've talked to her more and gotten to know her a little better during that time. I found out that she was going to go to the same high school as me though.It was at cross country running that I saw her again. There were practices every day after school until the last friday, so it's over now. It's there that I started to really like her, but unfortunately I never really talked to her all that much or got to know her. I might have talked to her five times at most since the start of the school year, and I have no idea what to say to her. Now that cross country is over, there's no times or places where I normally see her (the schedule for fencing changed since I changed classes). I'd really like to get to know this girl as a friend at least, but I don't know how or where to talk to her. Sorry for making this so long, but I'd appreciate any advice that you may have. Here's a link (I know, more reading) if you're interested, where I touch on the same situation http://www.afraidtoask.com/forums/showflat.php?Cat=&Board=TeenHealth&Number=122101&page=0&view=collapsed&sb=5&o=&fpart=1

I knew a girl in high school in which the same situation applied. I wanted to get to know her, but I didn't know what to say. So I never did anything. After graduation I never saw her again. Let my story be a lesson to you.If you see her walking down the hall try to walk beside her. Maybe just walk beside her and not say anything at first but after a little while, "hey, how have you been?" She'll probably reply with something along the lines of, "oh hey, I'm doing pretty good" or "I'm doin' alright". She might ask how you are. Stay optimistic with your reply even if you're not doing that good. Then you can mention that you've seen her around and that you always thought about getting to know her better. Depending on the reply you can feel out where to go from here but if what she's throwing at you is positive then that's your chance to find out where and when you might be able to catch up with her again later.

Here's a peice of advice from me, my friend Mike, he for some reason attracts a lot of women, or at least, the good looking ones, which is surprising becuase he's the least expected one to attract anyone! Anyway, the main reason he attracts women is by being well mannered, slightly sarcastic, and, most of all, he acts as if he's known the girl for a while. He acts as if they've just been friends, hat way, he can talk to them much easier than a stuttering kid who obviously has a crush. I suggest you take this peice of advice.\

Thanks for your guys suggestions. Unfortunately, websexinfo, I don't think that'll work out for me. I'll try your suggestions if there's opportunity, but I rarely ever see her (passed by her once this week, going the other way down the hall). I think I have a better idea of where her locker is, so that may help if I purposely try to go somewhere where I'll see her (another problem is that none of my classes are near there). I don't want this to come across the wrong way, but I really hope that your story doesn't end up happening in my case. Trying to be more confident couldn't hurt either, I'll try out your suggestion Sephiroth.Any other ideas on what I could do? I really want to talk more with this girl, but I just don't know what to say her or how to approach her.

man i was in the same situation... There was this girl, i just wanted to talk to her but i never did for the first semester... then finally my chance came up and i just said Hi, and started a conversation with hre... a week later we were going out, and have been ever sinceSo man, don't just sit there and do nothing is what i'm trying to say... because if you do you will be left with, teh feeling of what could have been...And as awkward as it may seem, you just gotta get over it... its a highschool thing i guess

I can't stop thinking about this girl, and I'm rarely seeing her in the hallways. What should I say to her when I get the chance to talk to her, what are good things to talk about? (I'm bad at this sort of thing) I only wish I knew more about her and where to find her. I think one problem is that she seems to be busy with alot of things so she never really sticks around the school, except possibly at lunch, but I rarely ever see her then (to any of you who can relate to not meeting up with the person you want to see, isn't it so annoying that there's so many random people you don't know who you seem to pass by many times every day, just not that person).

So basically, what's a good thing to say to her to start up a conversation, or good things to talk about? (as I said before I'm bad at this sort of thing)

In reply to:

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So basically, what's a good thing to say to her to start up a conversation, or good things to talk about? (as I said before I'm bad at this sort of thing)

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There are lots of possibilities. In a school situation there are plenty of local issues. But until she asks about yourself, it's best to keep it centred on her, rather than on yourself.

to butt in, that is the hardest thing to do. It seems that all girls want is to try and see if you are serious. i run out of words sometimes coming up with ways to keep the conversationcentered on her. pain in the ass.

This may not be good advice for your situation... the straightforward approach might be best... but this is what I used to do when I was younger and wanted to meet someone who was more or less a stranger. I'd figure out who he hung out with, and then I'd make friends with his friends. That way, I'd have a legitimate excuse/ opportunity for being around him. This worked better for me than the straightforward approach for a couple of reasons: 1. I was shy when I was younger, and I was afraid I'd say something stupid or be flat-out rejected or made fun of if I just walked right up to some stranger that I was attracted to and started talking. I had no problem, however, talking to his friends; without the element of attraction there, I was much less shy and self-conscious and didn't have trouble starting conversations, etc. 2. Guys seem put off by girls who openly and aggressively chase them down (or at least the ones I knew were like that), so it seemed like I had a better chance of hooking up with someone if I sort of insinuated my way into his circle of friends and then waited for him to notice me.Sometimes this worked and other times it didn't... but even if it didn't work and the guy continued to ignore me, I'd lost nothing really, and gained new friends. And a lot of times, you know, it did actually work. I'm not sure how well this strategy would work for a guy, but it might be worth a try. Make friends with her friends, put yourself out there until she gets used to your presence, and then try talking to her. At least you'll have friends in common then, and things to talk about, and it might seem less weird and awkward than just approaching a total stranger and trying to talk to her.

I'm still in the same situation, sigh.... I don't know how to talk to her and I rarely see her. I could wait until later when I will see her more (track and field in the spring), but I really like this girl and that would be tough. The straightforward approach is the only way I can think of doing it since I don't know any of her friends better than I know her (which is barely at all, but I've never even spoken to her friends). The closest thing is one of my best friends, who plays the same instrument as her in band class. He doesn't really know her, and it would be kind of weird for him to be the mediator, it's not his strong point. So really, I don't know anyone who knows her.

This is driving me crazy. I know I really like like her, and I can't think of how to talk to her. I think about her every day, she's a great person, I just wish I knew her better. Anyway, I haven't talked to her in a long time, and I rarely pass by her.
I'll probably see her tomorrow on a field trip (it's a band trip, lol) to see the symphony - it's some school thing for band students through out the city. Any suggestions on what to say to her to start a conversation or something like that. It's just that I look at this as a good chance to see her (not for 3 sec in the hall), and talk to her - if I can get up the guts or find the right situation. Whether this sounds pathetic or not, I don't know... but I really like this girl and I don't know what to talk about or say to her. Getting to know her is important to me, especially since I'd be a whole lot less nervous asking her out.

Starting a conversation with someone just comes naturally. Just gotta say things which you would with anyone else, ask her questions - like how she is and what she'll be doing over the weekend - add humour, you know, stuff like that once you start talking you won't realise that you have gotten into a conversation with her. As for asking her out, are you sure it's definatley easier asking someone out that you know or are mates with? But either way it don't matter for now. Your first job is to gain the confidence and go up to her. Then you'll realise how easy it is to start a conversation with someone.

Damn, I went without saying anything to her. I was sitting just in front of her on the bus back to school, but she was talking to her friend at first, and I just didn't know what to say. I sat there staring out the window for most of the time, trying to think of what to say... but drawing a blank. I feel like I've missed yet another opportunity.Also, in reply to your post, that's sort of my problem. You say that I should just say something that I normally would to any other person, but I have sort of a social problem like that. I just don't know what to say, my mind draws a blank. I can never just start something up with someone unless there's a topic I need to ask them about - not just for the sake of talking with them. The part that eats me up real bad is I think that she may sort of like me, maybe only to want to get to know me as a friend, but she never says anything to me either. She'll sit close to me alot of times (not right close as in right beside, but like behind or one over) at whatever we may be at. I feel like I'm being almost avoidant by not saying something, I hate how I always have problems talking to people like this

I understand what you mean about talking to her, one of my mates is going through the same thing. I was kinda like that, but what I did was get this girl's mobile number and text her, which I found easier, then we began talking in person etc. and in the end of it we ended up going out. But personally as hard as it may seem, I think the best thing you can do is speak to her straight off in person. I know you said that you go blank and can't think of anything to say when you want to speak to her, but you could at least make a start by everytime you see her, you can smile at her or say "Hi" while passing by.Thing is you are just gonna have to go up to her and speak to her at some point, or else you may not get anywhere no matter how hard it is.Trust me once you do it, it will DEFINATLEY get easier, even if it does feel embarassing or weird at first.

Well, here's a small peice of advice. I asked out my first girlfriend online. I knew her for a while, so we've talked in person before. Anyway, I did it online because, like some people, I can get my feelings out better in writing. I don't know if it's the same for you, RobBob, but try it.

I wish I knew her msn or something like that. I'll ask her the next time I talk to her. I'm hoping at the fencing competition this weekend, or the one the weekend after which would be even more awesome since it's a four day trip (I don't know if she'll be going, and on a side note, this time of the year has lots of competitions).I don't think I'd ask her out online, that just wouldn't feel right for me. But I do think that I'm often better at getting to know people online, especially people that I tend to get nervous and shy around in public (for example, her). Thanks for the advice ^_^

Damn, she's not going on the trip. She's not on the sheet of people going, I had my doubts since she hasn't fenced all that long yet. Her event in the competition this weekend isn't the same time as mine on sunday. They last awhile, but if I see her I doubt it'll be for long. She starts at 8:00, I start at 11:00. I accidently looked at it wrong the first time and thought both our events are on saturday at 8:00, which would've been awesome.I wonder if I creep her out at all. Every time I see her I look at her (not stare, but I notice she's there and look briefly), and I'm pretty sure she's noticed. I don't say anything to her though, since she's always in a rush when I see her. The only time I ever do (see her that is) is at the start of lunch, and she must have something that she has to get to. I'm almost always with my friends at that point, and unfortunately, we don't hang around the school. We always leave to my friend's house, which by the time we get back leaves us with a few minutes to get to class.

go for her mate

hehe

See this post.