Friend problems.

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There are 2 people I hang out with that pretty much are the reason I became social, but I don't think I like them. I say to myself all the time, "I'm not hanging out with them again" but then I do. There names are Chris and Andrew. Chris is a guy who is all about looking cool and he gets all of his money from his mom usually. He wears things like Aeropostale and American Eagle and always wants to get "what everyone else is wearing these days" such as bape jackets, etc. He told me he plans on never working and makes fun of me because I have a close to a full-time job. He also makes fun of me in a discrete humorous way like I am stupid or something.Andrew is a very religious guy. He is all about god but his actions are very hypocritical. The other day he got mad at me and hit me with a basketball, and on the other hand, I'm an atheist and I would never do something like that. He is also like Chris except he likes to look cool by purchasing really expensive clothers and he even WORRIES about looking cool. He stands in the mirror to make sure he looks cool and such. He won't even do something as simple as walking in to Subway to grab something to eat without fixing his air and putting on his most expensive clothes. He doesn't know his phone number to his house because he has it in his contacts list on his cellphone and he wouldn't even walk in to the school office and ask for his phone number because he thought he would look stupid.When me, Chris and Andrew hang out, I find out that Chris and Andrew like the same things. They don't even agree with me on 5% of the things I say unless it's music. For example, Chris and Andrew both like the Bengals it was Chris who like the Bengals and then Andrew hopped on board with him. Andrew and Chris both like the Jazz in the NBA. And anytime a discussion or argument occurs, Chris backs Andrew up. I have a real problem with this. They act like anything I do is dumb and what they do is cool and stuff. Lastly, let me explain to you how I am. I don't give a damn about what other think about me, but I certainly don't like being laughed at. We are all in high school and I am working because I don't have someone paying for everything (like Andrew and Chris). I've been working 30-40 hours a week while in high school the past month. I don't care if I look "cool" or not. I just be myself and I say whatever I like. The way Chris and Andrew have thought processes are like "is this cool or not? if it is, then I'll say it, if it isn't then I won't." I am not a people pleaser that is for sure. I don't agree with everyone just to make them feel good but that is exactly what Andrew and Chris do. I just don't like their personalities. It bothers me how they carry themselves.Any thoughts on this? I don't know what I should do because they always call me to hang out but I don't know if I want to anymore.

Hmm, why not try broadening your friends horizon a little , maybe stay in touch with Chris and Andrew but keep them more loosely you may choose that hanging out with them isn't necessarily what you want but don't chose until you are sure.As for holding down a steady job, good for you , it sounds like your friends are given there every want and don't understand a work ethic as they have never had to work for there earnings. I knows its easy to say ignore there snide remarks but really , having your job will really benefit you in the long run. Being yourself is so VERY important, people should love you for you are not who you would like to be. If you are happy with who you are then i am sure making some new friends will be easy try make friends who are interested in the same things as you unlike Andrew and Chris.Torx

I would drop those friends if I were you.Like you said, you're not even happy around them, and they just make fun of you and are spoiled people.Why can't younf ind some other (better) friends? And next time those two idiots call, tell them you have other plans.

Um, Aeropastle isn't an expensive store at all, and they usually have sales on top of sales (YAY). So it's stupid that he's parading around like he's rich... It's not like he's wearing Gucci or Prada or whatever. And he sounds like an even bigger loser with his "I plan on never working" bullshit.If they are annoying you, then stop hangin out with them. It's honestly easy to drop friends, just stop answering their calls, stop calling them, and only give one-word answers to anything they say to you (but still nice, because if you are mean, then they think you are mad about something, and will probably try to make things better). But ask yourself: Why are you hanging out with them? Is it because you want to be accepted too, or you want people to think you're cool, or are you just bored? I mean, there's nothing wrong with getting along with people, really.But 40 hours a week on top of school is pretty much INSANE... Just thought I'd let you know.

Well, to me Aeropostale is very expensive. I wear clothes from Wal-mart and the thrift store. I don't look like a homeless man, I still dress nice and stuff. It's just that my clothes aren't branded. They are still shirts and jeans but they don't have big names like A&E and Aeropostale. In fact I have an A&E shirt but I got it from a thrift store for about a dollar. They get clothes like every other day as well. I get clothes maybe like once every 3 months.

That sounds like me, droppydees, except in my case I get new clothes only when the old ones are so worn through they are no longer decent to wear. :smile:

Originally Posted By: IneligibleThat sounds like me, droppydees, except in my case I get new clothes only when the old ones are so worn through they are no longer decent to wear. I still wear them when the are worn thin... lol and the second hand shop is one of the coolest places to buy, so much cool stuff at a cheap price I rather have a few shirts then 1 expensive one

I agree with StillSearching. I mean, it's okay to focus on looking good and not being a "total dork," as the idiotic populars call it, but it's definitely not all right to always care about what everyone is wearing and blah blah blah. Just because everyone is doing it doesn't mean you should. I mean, it's all right to care about looking nice and all but it shouldn't be taken to a high extent to the point where you're like a clone of everyone else. Plus, those clothes (bape jackets, etc.) can get so unnecessarily expensive.

It's good that you have a job. IDK why people would make fun of it. It gives you a sense of independence, and you're not mooching off your parents like some little kid. I think your friends are just trying to "find themselves," in the big crowd but all the while being annoying dumbasses about it.

Are you a good debater? Because if you were, you could totally kick their ass xD. Their stream of thought revolves around what others think and very good points can be made against that idea.

I don't like the second friend in particular.

If you're going to be a religious person, apply your religious concepts to every aspect of your lifeUnfortunately, if everyone did that, the church would be a very very small place

What was Jerry Sienfeld said. "...it's because men wear their underwear until it absolutely disintegrates. Men hang on to underwear until, until each individual underwear molecule is so strained it can barely retain the properties of a solid. It actually becomes underwear vapor. We don't even throw it out, we just open a window and it goes out like dandelion spoors. That's how men throw out underwear we just go (blows on the mic) and it's gone."Is this you Pete? LoL Nobody turn a fan on Pete 'll be naked. j/k I guess I'm the odd ball. I have most of my clothes custom tailored. The only things I buy off the rack are generally jeans and t-shirts... and underwear. I like to look good. French cuffs, Ainsely collar, Scottish wool sport coat, silk waistcoat and tie... with jeans of course. I spend way to much on clothes.But it's not entirely my fault. Finding shit to fit me is near impossible. Clothes makers seem to think your short and fat or tall and thin. I can't find shirts that fit around my chest without fitting like a moo-moo around my stomach. And none of 'em are long enough. So I said to hell with it a few years ago and found a skilled tailor and have never gone back.

Well, shirts seem to slowly evaporate. The material becomes thinner and thinner, until you can't take it off without the delicate gossamer tearing. At that point I have to throw it away.

Trousers and boxer shorts fail in the crotch. I don't know why - I don't think I put an especially high load on that area. But it gets to the point that when sitting on the train, I have to keep my legs carefully closed or else the lady across from me will get an ugly eyeful.

You used in the glorious 70s to be able to get nylon underwear here. Now that lasted!

I have essentially three levels of clothes. Work and church: underpants, long-sleeved shirt, trousers (cheap, always the same), tie (thrift store), socks, shoes (also always the same, cheap jogger type). Other formal occasions outside: underpants, short-sleeved shirt from thrift store, jeans (cheap), flip-flops (we call them thongs here, but that could lead to misinterpretation). Inside or out walking the dog, replace the underwear and jeans with a pair of shorts (always the same).

"...nylon underwear here. Now that lasted!"Fuck longevity! Did the bastards breath? My boys gotta get plenty of air. I just have images of sweaty ball mold growing all over the place and all the neighborhood crotch hounds and ball sniffers burying there muzzles in your privates every time you go visiting."Oh, I don't mind Ms. Johnson. He just smells my dog."

I think it breathed quite well. After all, it was porous. They were in the bikini brief style that all guys under 80 wore here in those days. Now they only make them in cotton, which goes soggy in your sweat and rubs and chafes. Nylon never went soggy.

Um, it's not always expensive, and can sometimes be cheaper than WALMART. For instance, I just bought a hoody from there ($5) and a shirt ($1.50)... You really can't buy a hoody from Walmart for $5. If you look on the sale racks, you will get good deals.

Enough talk about clothes lol. That was an example. I've taken a look at the people I don't like and a lot of them I don't like because they are "fake" (if you will). I don't tend to like people who are people pleasers and crowd followers. When I say this I mean it in a certain way. One could make an argument to say I am a "crowd follower" if I am wearing a bape jacket like everyone else these days. I consider people "crowd followers" only if they want to wear bape jackets just because a lot of people also have started wearing them. That is different than someone going out to buy a bape jacket because they actually like it and think it is cool and doesn't buy it just because everyone else has it and it is the "it" thing this year. For example, I wear Vans shoes just like almost 1 out of 4 teens wear these days. I don't wear them because a lot of people in my school wear them, I wear them because they are very comfortable and poofy, which makes them extra comfortable. That is my "style" I guess. I'd rather be comfortable with who I am and what I wear than to live my life based on what other's think.

Well, you were like arguing me down... I just wanted you to know that it wasn't that bad of a store (it's my favorite store, actually).And I dunno, I tend to follow trends, because I'll see something I like, and I'll go, ooooh, that is so cute... And I'll have to try it myself. And sometimes it's just plain "association," like if I have good experiences with my friends, and all of them are wearing red, I start liking the color red, because it reminds me of those times.I don't know, I think a lot of people try just as hard (and are consequently just as fake) to NOT fit in as other people try to fit in.

Quote:What was Jerry Sienfeld said. "...it's because men wear their underwear until it absolutely disintegrates. Men hang on to underwear until, until each individual underwear molecule is so strained it can barely retain the properties of a solid. It actually becomes underwear vapor. We don't even throw it out, we just open a window and it goes out like dandelion spoors. That's how men throw out underwear we just go (blows on the mic) and it's gone." Love how u mention seinfeld.. there was a episode on this topic.. trying to get rid of a friend.

I completely agree with your last statement. I'm not one of those people who try NOT to fit in. I have genuine interest and like in everything I do. I don't let "popularity" sway my personality. On the other hand, Andrew does it so much. Chris is sort of the same way, but I am cool with him now. I figured out why I really don't like Andrew but I like Chris. Chris doesn't really try to "fit" in, he just likes what the majority likes and I am content with that as he treats me nice and I took it the wrong way and I am not very good with non-obvious jokes. That was my fault, I admit. But Andrew is a different story. It is like he STRIVES to like what everyone else likes. Like he won't get sketcher shoes because it isn't "in" these days. He has to get Nike or Adidas. He likes the Bengals because Chris liked them and now he likes Detroit Lions because both of my other friends liked them and he likes the Patriots for an understandable reason (his dad likes him) but he wants the Jaguars to beat them in the Playoffs because he likes the underdog? I'm like wtf. Contradictory bothers me, I will not lie. I just find that almost everything he does pisses me off. I don't know exactly why, it just does. He also says a lot of things to piss me off. Like I will make a joke like, "Okay, Mr. Nutrition" after he tells me what I'm eating is unhealthy and then he mocks me and says "Oh, I'm such a dork, I like to be healthy." On top of that, if anyone around him makes a joke or even tells a story (but me) he will laugh just to kind of be a people pleaser. He kind of just has an awkward silence when I say stuff and then laughs at me, but when others are around he laughs at the same stuff because other people laugh at it because they are GENUINE and I can see that. I think everyone can tell a genuine laugh from a fake laugh. I can go on and on and on. As some of you said, I dropped Andrew as a friend. I am still hanging out with Chris. Thanks for the advice!

It sounds like Andrew has a problem with self-confidence.

Well, now that I have stopped talking to Andrew for almost a week now, he thinks I am being MEAN to him by not talking to him. I talk to him but I don't ever really look at him and I just give him like one or two word answers. He won't hang out with Chris now because he thinks I am being mean to him and Chris is hanging out with me. Another one of my best friends, Augustine agrees with me and thinks Adam is "gay" in his own words. So I've pretty much stopped hanging out with Adam but I still don't know why he thinks I am being mean to him.

Since Andrew is lacking in self-confidence, validation by other people is very important to him.